I read the book titled Little Women years ago. I was not impressed nor did I want to be a little woman.
But I have been thinking a lot about this phenomenon, something I felt but could not put the finger on for a while.
While listening and looking around I now found a name for it: Little Men. No sarcasm there but a pinch of salt.
I hope that you dear reader, Earth Being with access to the Internet, realized by now that the reality we are all (more and more ) looking at (instead of making it) is extremely fragmented.
That means that we are all living in isolated realities, as wide as your screen is and as deep as the Internet can go.
That means that we are not understanding/hearing/feeling each other, even if the effort to include all extremes (did you yet meet men dressed like girls growing beards still ? You will) is there.
While this is happening, there is a reality still where men and women are still fighting over who gets the bigger hunk of meat, better said - who is bringing food home, who is in charge.
A reality where women feel the need to go on the streets, breasts dangling in the wind, so that they can scream aloud - I am a woman, respect me !
Where men become even more silent day by day, losing the connection to themselves, the connection to that...thing, the thing which makes a man masculine (the healthy kind).
They become more violent and confused about : how to be, where to go, what to do, how to speak, how not to behave, how to be with a woman and among other fellow men.
When everything, I mean each and every single thing, is being debated and brought to the Parliament of Life to impose a new law - things over here in Reality, not on the Internet will never change.
I listened to all these men (watch Modern Masculinity! *) I listen to men I work or speak to , I look at them on the streets, I listen.
They are not doing well.
Just like women, they are trapped inside a hurting (because outdated) paradigm.
Why is it wrong for men to feel a feeling?
Why is it wrong for them say so?
Why is it unacceptable for a man to be tired sometimes?
Why is it unacceptable for a man to need the love of a woman, not the sex?
Why is it unacceptable for a man to be masculine - caring, present, protective, warm hearted, open and loving, strong boundaries and rooting for their woman?
Why is it so wrong if a man doesn't know something and needs help?
It is indeed sad that men nowadays, facing all of this shit (and more) I mentioned, take a few steps back and refuse to grow up - their bodies grow, their emotional intelligence not and they become what I now call Little Men.
I find this alarming and worrisome. Why?
Because we all live together here.
Masculine energy is being shaped and influenced by the female energy and the other way around.
We as groups, as divergent realities, react to what the others are doing and thinking.
Imagine a microscope and the particles moving around and how they react to the presence of the other - as if surprised to notice that there is someone else there.
Men feel, are confused and lost too?
Duh?! They never had the chance to learn about themselves and so grow up into child-men or abusers.
How do they grieve then? Feeling is a process by which emotions are being processed by the mind and heart= living.
Have you seen crying men often?
Have you seen men taking time off and sitting with themselves to take care of their wounds?
Have you seen many going to the psychologist or even a simple doctor as to say - this is hurting me, help me please?
No.
Men are not allowed to feel therefore they do not even know how.
They don't know how to express themselves: other than through violence, self harming activities, addictions of all kinds - sex, emotional deregulation, depressive or over-exited states, drugs, excessive work, porn, alcohol etc.
How to men grieve then? How do they grow up? Do they?
I don't know.
Yet.
*See also :
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